Yep. That's my new rule as I embark on the next few weeks of stress, chaos and lots of things completely out of my control. I realized today that I really don't handle stress well. Which surprises me because I like to think that I can adapt quickly and welcome change. However - that does not include stressful situations.
This past weekend I dog sat for my new favorite little pup - Eliza. I adore her. I also had a nice and hearty paper to get done by midnight last night. I think I've mentioned in a prior post that the class I'm in right now is Lifespan Development Psychology. I absolutely love the items that I'm reading about and it is genuinely interesting to me. Problem is - I don't care about a grade. I'm not one for competition and I sort of feel like that's what school is about. Who can get the best grade? Until this point I have succeeded in having straight As for my college career, which for me is a huge accomplishment. I despised high school and so to actually focus on something in college and do my best at it is very ... nice. So what I discovered the other day is that part of why I don't participate in sports is because I don't like the competition aspect of it. I understand why others do, but I am just not wired that way. With this class in particular, I feel like the reason I am paying over $1k a class is so I can learn about this subject by a professional and learn tools to aid me later. So I don't see the point in writing a bloody paper! Is my measly little 6-8 page paper going to make a difference in someone's life? Uh... no. Now, if it were then I might care. Scratch that, HELL YES I would care if it made a difference in someone's life. But it doesn't. Instead I'm competing with 15 other students for the best grade. At least that's what it feels like right now. SO. I stressed and agonized all weekend long about this stupid paper. And it wasn't stupid really, just insignificant. My topic was sign language with babies. I had to find a journal and then critically analyze it. PAINFUL. I'd rather endure a migraine for 2 days, and that's saying a lot. Anyways. Got it done. Turned it in. Wiped my hands. Then I couldn't fall asleep last night and ended up watching Keeping up with the Kardashians until 2 am. Yep. And I ate half a bag of potato chips. Of course with Eliza woke me up at 6am to go potty I was exhausted. SO I slept in a couple extra hours. Got to work and within about 15 minutes began to just feel strange. I had a decent breakfast so I think my blood sugar was fine, but I just felt... off, ya know? Talked to my boss and left for the day. Ahhh... came home, did some light cleaning and straightening and then soaked in my fabulous tub for about 30 minutes.
During the tub soak I prayed for almost the entire time and got out feeling refreshed and much better than this morning. Why you ask? Because - I did what many other Christian women have recommended - Give it to GOD. Of course I struggle with this every single day because I'm a control freak. Today I reminded myself that I have to give it to God. There is so much out there that I have absolutely no control over and it is wasted time for me to worry about it. Right? RIGHT! Then I had a fabulous little nap and when Ace got home I felt good enough to work out. We headed to the workout room and I walked for almost 2 miles. It felt great and then when we got home I talked him into doing a 10 min yoga exercise with me. I can only hope that between the workout and wonderful soak, I can get a good night's sleep.
So the other issue that has been heavy on my heart and mind lately is our road trip to San Diego next week. First of all, we are going to be in the car for 15+ hours with a young child. GAH! Are we nuts?? Yes, a little. But I have done a ton of research and prepared the craft/goody bag tonight in high hopes that we will make it to Cali and back in one piece. After checking all sorts of web sites online I feel ready. I have a bag full of goody bags for the squirt along with tons of crafts, puzzles and other misc items to keep us all busy for a good 4-5 days. Now second, we are staying with Ace's family. For the past few weeks I've been planning and planning and going over all the details in my head. This day we'll do this, tomorrow we'll do that, etc. It finally dawned on me today during the fabulous soak that I really need to focus on including Ace's family in as much as possible. They don't get to see us very often and so it's not fair of me to whisk the squirt away to all these cool places just because I want to keep him busy. I realized that I can keep him busy and visit with the family at the same time. It might be a little challenging, but I can do it. Better yet - WE can do it.
Final word: I will survive the next several weeks. I will be patient with school and accept that I don't have to get an "A" on everything. I will also pray a LOT on our trip to San Diego and practice as much grace as possible.
OH! A couple fun things to look forward to - - A hair cut on Thursday, nails done on Saturday, hanging with close friends on Sunday and **hopefully** seeing the new Twilight movie, New Moon. GAH!! I am sooo excited.
No comments:
Post a Comment